This is it. The frantic planner inside me has realized that the end of the year approaches and that in order to not be stressed in the last days of the year I should start preparing things now. Great idea and that has me be somewhat … stressed.
It’s almost like the old machine has kicked in again. I can’t remember for how many years November and December have had this rhythm. Probably ever since I started working. Finishing things before year end and getting ready for restful family time over the holidays. So, for 20 years, always the same frenzy – why this year?
There are only few things that my new status as freelance requires me to finish for year-end. No complicated budget planning needed, now headcount targets to achieve, no strategic plan my boss wants to read over Christmas. And yet, I feel that I want to finish things for the end of the year. Is this in my DNA? Am I just reproducing old patterns? Do I just go with the rhythm of my environment? Would it be better to finish an online course a week before or after Christmas? Does it make a difference if I have all my blogposts and practices for next year planned before it starts? …
It probably does not matter that much! And maybe many things in the past years did not matter much either. It probably matters much more how I am with my kids, my clients my family. That I am not getting stressed and that I do what needs to really get done rather than shining all the plates before the 31st December – which is just any day (well, not really, because it’s my oldest daughter’s birthday, but in many regards it is just an ordinary day).
So, as a practice in theses weeks more than most other weeks in the year, when I feel my jaws tighten and the stress rise in my stomach.When I think “just finish this. Quickly. Today”. Then, I’ll pause for an instant, take a deep breath and ask myself “does it really matter if it gets done today?”. And you? Why not practice along with me and maybe let me know how you do?