piling up

Sometimes it’s the banal things in life that trigger deep thoughts, right?

When I lately cleaned out my handbag, I came to see again how much I am a « keeper », holding on to things and pushing out a decision to separate myself from them. And my handbag really just is a symbol for many areas of my life (and house).

There’s this ever growing bottom fill that I carry around, which makes by bag heavier and heavier and ultimately prevents me from finding things in my bag that I really need, like my keys.
As I extracted the pebbles (in the picture above) that I picked up on an afternoon I spent at the river with my kids from the tangled mass of receipts, business cards, hankies, candy, … I realized that not only in my handbag I miss clarity and essence, but in a few areas of my life.

I discovered that by holding on to many things (or people, engagements, habits) I lose sight of what really is important to me. I don’t have the energy to run, when I carry such a heavy bag with me all the time, I don’t see what matters, I don’t hear the friend who really needs me to listen, I miss the sunny afternoon playing in the garden with my daughter, because I run for each and every appointment.

So, what’s my conclusion from this realization?

Firstly, it’s that cleaning out regularly, sorting what I need, what I want and what I can let go of is a habit I want to take. Maybe not scheduled, but being more aware of those signals that tell me it’s time to let go. When I get stressed, when I am listening less and running more.

Secondly, it’s to remain conscious about the engagements I take, to learn to say « no ». This new « no » comes from a place where I mean it, because I want to say « yes » to something else. No guilt, no regrets.

How about you? How about a practice of checking what kind of « too much » you carry around for a long time? Take a moment to reflect what feels stressful or burdening – engagements, people, possessions – and identify what makes it hard to let go of something and what holding on prevents in your life.